What the hell is this?

This is the home of The Gnome - secret world dictator, philosopher, esoteric teacher, anarchist, ambassador to alien races, celebrity gossip hound, and all around magnificent being.

More to the point, this is the central clearing house for all of The Gnome's propoganda, news, musings, directions, and secret cookie recipes. Here you will find the disjointed ramblings that occupy his mind, forums for faithful minions, and mind-numbing games to ease the unitiated into loving acceptance of Gnome Rule.

Enjoy your stay and don't be afraid to try the cake.

Thinking for You

There are lots of horrible things in the world, but those aren't your problems.

Gnomes in the News

'Gnome Among Gum Trees' 5/26/08 - Sisters Beach, Australia.

SISTERS Beach man Roger Bradley did not know what he was starting five years ago when he put hinges and a latch on a tree near his home. ...

'Concert Review: The Nicotine Fits, Mr. Gnome and Hopeless Destroyers' 5/21/08 - Kansas City.

I challenge you to find a review of a two-piece, male-female rock band that doesn’t reference the White Stripes. This comparison is unavoidable, so I’ll get it over with quickly. The Cleveland duo Mr. Gnome features Nicole Barille on guitar and vocals, and Sam Meister (an awesome name) on drums. ...

'Gnome home gets update at library' 5/19/08 - Missoula, MT.

Nepotism isn't always a bad thing, and Steve Gonzales is proof.

Late last year, Karen Gonzales, children's librarian at the Missoula Public Library, was looking for someone who could turn a vision into a reality. And do it without breaking the budget. ...

'When will the Gnomes Come Home?' 5/19/08 - San Mateo, CA.

Hidden in the lush ivy and blooming raspberry bushes of a quiet San Mateo street sat a family of garden gnomes well known to the residents of Kingsridge Drive — and then the happy bunch disappeared last week. ...